A lesson I keep having to (re)learn.
It was one of those one-liners that smacked you across the lower jaw.
“A lesson I keep having to learn time and again and again, is the value of going to things I don’t actually want to.”
I was surprised to read it from this friend as they had always been the life of the party. They always turned up to things cheerfully with some beverages, a big grin and raucous laughter.
And yes, afterwards if you were to sit down quietly they would say that they did have a smashing time. But when they first got in the car... Well, they thought ‘Why am I doing this?’
As we slide dizzily down to the end of the year (did I spot some tinsel the other day?) I will lay odds that someone reading this, will attend a ‘gathering’ with a modicum of reluctance.
But something happens at these gatherings. I have never quite worked out the chemistry, but it is partly to do with the sacrifice of time and energy involved. Somehow it means that we come away thinking ‘Well that wasn’t quite so bad after all’. And there’s always the car gossip on the way home. ‘Did you notice how so and so has aged, that person was quieter, what's his name kept on hiving off to the backyard to chat on their phone.’
My friend was right... It's a lesson we learn time and time again because the next time we will still probably set out with the same grumpy mindset. The value is in the discipline, willingness and the encounters we have that will surprise and intrigue us. Perhaps the secret ingredient is knowing that everyone else has made an extra effort to be with you.