Jesus, The Party Guy.
One of Fr. David’s pet theories is that Jesus must have been dragged along to lots of parties when he was a child. Frequently The Teacher will use the imagery of a party to make some of his most incisive points about the Kingdom of Heaven.
Remember the story about the dress code at the wedding and the guy who got caught without the right clothes? In adult life, Our Lord’s first miracle was to shout fine wine at the wedding at Cana. And who could forget the dinner party at the tax collector's place when the young lady wept all over his feet and wiped them with her hair, causing eyebrows to rocket skyward and mumblings to rumble in the kitchen?
And here we have another wedding party story. The first thing that strikes you is the sense of tedium that sets in whilst waiting for the Bridegroom.
For those who have had the experience of waiting for a long time, you know what it means to fight off boredom. You do everything in your power to stay enthused. You use every ounce of strength and adrenaline, you draw on all your resources, but even so, you metaphorically fall asleep.
We fall asleep out of tiredness or out of distrust. We fall asleep because we are disappointed or because we don’t want to see the truth of things around us. We fall asleep because we are superficial or because we have lost the courage to hold out a little longer.
This passage describes the sleepiness that spreads through the community tired of waiting for the Bridegroom. It should be a night of celebration and joy because the Bridegroom, the one that brings the fullness of life is finally returning: But instead, our nighttime becomes frustrating: things don’t happen as we had hoped. God doesn’t work according to our schedule and the Bridegroom does not arrive when we want him to. I know this painfully well because clergy get just as spiritually drowsy as anyone. It’s why we went on retreat.
According to the parable, everyone falls asleep: both the wise virgins and the foolish ones. It is as if to say that falling asleep is inevitable, a fact of life. It is not avoiding sleep that differentiates the wise from the foolish.
The problem of the foolish virgins is not sleepiness, but something more fundamental. They never took care of the lamp that they were given. The Bridegroom even says that he does not know them. In their lives, they have never cared about the Bridegroom and that is why they are unprepared now.
Now we get that the Bridegroom is Jesus returning. But what’s the deal with the virgins? Who are they and what do they represent? The Oil is a symbol of the Spirit, okay. But why don’t the wise virgins share it? And above all, why does the Bridegroom lock the other five out of the feast? Isn’t He being harsh and discriminatory?
Perhaps this will help. I sometimes think that if Jesus were telling parables today, he would have told a Parable of the Marathon Runner to make the point he is making here. You don’t just get up off the couch and run 26 miles. You start small and you build up the ability to do it. You get ready for the Big Day by living each small day before it with the clear awareness that the Big Day is coming when the habits, skills, and abilities you have cultivated before then will be required of you to meet the challenge of That Day.
The oil in the lamps is like that. We are given the Holy Spirit, but we are required to obey the Spirit and thus expand our capacity for receiving more of the Holy Spirit.
This is why the wise virgins could not share their oil. I cannot borrow your relationship with God. I can’t ‘do’ your relationship with God. I have to cultivate my own.
In the parable, the foolish virgins lacking the oil of the Spirit, go off to get some. Notably, the text does not say that they return with oil. They show up at the wedding and want in. But they cannot come in. Why? Because they still do not have the oil of the Spirit. They have not in any way prepared themselves for a relationship with the Bridegroom any more than the couch potato has prepared himself for the Marathon. The Big Day is here and they cannot meet it because they have not prepared, in any way. Nobody can do it for you. You have to do it yourself.
And it's a salutary lesson for laity and clergy. Yes, we visit and call and email and harangue and invite and welcome but the bottom line is simply this. It’s up to the individual to physically get themselves to Church. We can do so much, and this parish does it better than most, but the actual relationship, its enhancement, its enrichment and its rejuvenation is up to the individual. We can pray with you and We can pray about you, but we can’t pray in your place by proxy.
The good news. The party is already in full swing. Come on in. The wine is poured, and there is laughter and joy. You are welcome and expected. Dance and giggle with us. Jesus the party guy has been waiting for you.