You did not choose me but I chose you. And I appointed you to go and bear fruit, fruit that will last, so that the Father will give you whatever you ask him in my name.
“You did not choose me but I chose you”.
As a very young adolescent I failed to grasp the full significance of these words. Perhaps I was incapable at such an early age. There was a crass, naïve part of me that thought that I had cooked the whole vocation thing up myself. That somehow it was all my idea and of course I had rattled God’s cage first and not the other way round. Mind you to rattle God’s cage is something only done by the foolish, the brave and the desperate.
But there I was in the Bishops study one day, dewy eyed and dripping with idealistic piety. Apparently later on the Bishop said to someone that I was like a young puppy dog falling all over itself in a rush to get to the altar. Little did I realise that the altar was the place of brokenness and sacrifice.
Somehow I had thought that this priesthood thingy was all my idea. Didn’t I carefully choose my year 12 subjects with theological college in mind. Hadn’t I, all by myself, come to the inescapable understanding that there was nothing else that I would rather be?
It took countless years to come to a more helpful perspective, a clearer understanding that it was actually God’s initiative a very long time ago.
You did not choose me … no I chose you. Read it more carefully, more diligently. What does the text tell you? What does the text actually say?
But all this vocation is equally as important and right for you as well. God had always wanted you to enjoy him and over the years has provided opportunities for you to respond. They may have been subtle and they may have come in strange wrapping paper, but God has always taken the initiative with you and wanted you to be here with him at the altar today.
Now for the irksome bit.
If God sends us out to encounter and engage with other people, then he must also send other people to rub shoulders and to challenge us and draw us ever closer to Him. And that is a celebratory and challenging vocation. Further we are called to be the fruit that will last and not wither at the first blight of fear or disappointment.
And while I wonder who it is that you might engage with and enjoy this week, I wonder who it is that God will send into your life to help you grow into the person He has called you to be. Sometimes we need to have a few rough edges sanded off us and so God will send us the appropriate person. Sometimes we need to be soothed, sometimes we need to be listened to and sometimes we just simply need to listen.
You and I are in the terrifying business of worshipping a God who takes the initiative and calls liquorice all sorts into His family as our brothers and sisters. A quick think about some of the clergy that you have had should tell you that God has the most outrageous, scandalous and puzzling sense of humour.
And I can’t help but think that sometimes He just plays with us given the curious people He gives us.
We don’t get to choose the people God sends into our lives. He takes the initiative and gives us who will be best for us and sometimes they are not altogether to our liking.
Ultimately it must always be who we need. Not who we want. It must always be what God wants. Sometimes the God of surprise and vocation is exasperating but He is never boring.
You did not choose me… no I chose you And I appointed you to go and bear fruit, fruit that will last, so that the Father will give you whatever you ask him in my name.
Michael Leunig knew this well so I conclude with a prayer he wrote. It explains this vocation or sending concept in charming but confronting words. It would take a very courageous soul to use it. One day I might be trusting enough of God to pray it.
God give us rain when we expect sun.
Give us music when we expect trouble.
Give us tears when we expect breakfast.
Give us dreams when we expect a storm.
Give us a stray dog when we expect congratulations.
God play with us, turn us sideways and around.
Amen.