22/6/25
The Fear of Relapse.
In 1976, I read the book The Exorcist. I was an impressionable youth, and I can still recall that today’s gospel is quoted in part on the flyleaf of the book.
The story of the tortured naked guy living in the tombs of Gerasenes would make for great television, especially the whole swine charging down into the sea.
The stories we get on our news feeds, whatever yours happens to be, are often heavily laced with fear. Hence, we get fire, flood, road accidents, the taking of life, and you can probably think of a whole lot of stories you’ve seen recently where there has been an element of fear. Check out the questions that the interviewer asks.
Are you worried that
Do you think that…
What would be the worst possible scenario for ….
Can you confirm that this incident won’t happen again?
Our gospel today is also heavily laced with fear. The locals fear of the possessed man. Their fear of Jesus, remember, they sent him away at the end of the story. The demons' fear of Jesus.
‘What have you to do with me, Jesus, Son of the Most High God? I beg you, do not torment me”
Right at the end of the gospel, there is a curious little conversation between the exorcised man (Let’s call him Frank) and the Master.
Frank asks to stay with Jesus, but Jesus sends him away, saying ‘Return to your home, and declare how much God has done for you.’
Now, it’s not explicitly spelled out here, but I think that Frank wants to stay with The Master for two reasons.
First, his liberating experience would be such a pleasurable thing that, of course, he would want to stay close to the source of the one who has so richly blessed him.
But mixed through and folded into this desire is another fear. The fear of relapse.
Perhaps in Frank’s mind is the fear that if Jesus leaves, then the demons will come back and possess him. He would be back to his old way of ditching his clothes and being tortured in mind, and he really would prefer his cleaned-up self just the way he his, thank you very much. There’s something about Frank’s trust or lack of it in all of this as well.
The fear of relapse is a very understandable and logical dread. I have met some folk, who, having recently been given the ‘all clear’ really aren’t quite ready to accept the gift, grasp and live it for fear that it might be an illusion. You see the scenario… perhaps you have lived it or are living it yourself.
The fear of relapse is a thief because it robs you of the present. All those exciting things that you can and should be getting on with and enjoying right now.
The fear of relapse is a thief because it robs you of the future. I might relapse in 6 months, 12 months time and therefore I can’t plan to do 6.5 and Y, T and Z
The fear of relapse is a thief because it robs you of the ministry of those who want to reach out to you and serve you. You can become so self absorbed that you miss out and your friends and family miss out.
Still with me? Good. Now just to add to my completely unprovable theory I reckon that the Master understands that Frank suffers from the fear of relapse and so to remedy his anxiety he gives him a task to combat his fear.
‘Return to your home, and declare how much God has done for you.’
There is something about the telling, of the speaking out loud that makes it real. For example, the retelling of a grim prognosis or the spruiking of your tattslotto winning makes your big news more real. The more you pass on your news, the more concrete it becomes. Yes it really is all happening. My winnings, prognosis is factual.
And it is most certainly true when we hear the gospel read. It’s not just a retelling of a nice Jesus story. Jesus speaks to us and his message becomes palpable to us and our hearts burn within us.
Henri Nouwen articulates this beautifully in his book ‘With Burning Hearts’
“The Word of God is sacramental. That means it is sacred, and as a sacred word, it makes present what it indicates. When Jesus spoke to the two sad travellers on the road to Emmaus and explained to them the words of scriptures that were about himself, their hearts began to burn, that is to say, they experienced his presence. Speaking about himself he became present to them. With his words he did much more than simply make them think of him, or instruct them about himself, or inspire them with his memory. Through his words, he became really present to them. This is what we mean by the sacramental quality of the word. The word creates what it expresses.”
So, what would happen if we did what Frank did and went and declared what God has done for us? Would not our fear of relapse evaporate, and our hearts burn within us?